Personal Tao - Chapter 32
Helping Others Change
A simple truth, people resist change. If you truly want to help a person change. Be patient. Time how you help a person with awareness of their process and story.
Reconsider Your Reasons
Here is the trap: many change pushers work to change others for the wrong reason. Don’t try to change others to save the world or to validate your changes: it won’t work. (The graceful reason to helps others change is merely to help a person grow.)
Is it your time to change? Then focus on your change. Live your change don’t live your change through others. You are now discovering it’s hard to change. Add in an awareness that change is all about timing in addition to your hard work.
One trap is trying hard to change others more than truly working upon our own change. We hope that others will change the world for us. This approach won’t work as people around you will be too busy resisting change. People by nature often resist change.
That resistance you come across will frustrate you. You will blame others for not changing. But that resistance is actually your resistance to change. Refocus and double down on your path now.
Don’t change others for success.
Changing the world,
Solving our greatest challenges…
All start within our personal process:
Of solidifying our changes first.
We might need help, but avoid trying to change others as your base for help! Let people help you as they are, as they are willing to help. You will find better support in this manner.
True change is to step into our own change
Leave the path of others to be about their path.
Why is it Hard to Change?
This chapter is to show a person how hard it is to change your habits. For example how hard it is just to turn a book 180 degrees to finish reading the second poem. Most people reading the book will refuse to rotate the book around. I was surprised to discover that 99% of readers just push on to the next page. Of course, if you are reading the chapter on a computer, it’s extremely difficult to rotate your monitor around. This shows the second problem, as technology/communication models change, the very nature of how we can work with older ideas and structures shift even more dramatically.
If it’s hard to change a simple habit, how hard is it to change your life and to shift lifestyles? It’s very difficult and hence part of the problem we face as a modern culture that has to address its own needs to change now.
As a Taoist, I teach
Since we live in times of high potential: what does that mean for you?
We are at the peak of a large wave of change, soon to crest. A wave of change rippling out to shift society and how people live life.
- Will you let yourself be changed to outside forces…
- Will you follow your inner potential…allowing yourself to blossom as yourself?
As this chapter illustrates most people resist change, flow with momentum around them. This means the majority of people will naturally let their change be answered by outside forces. Taoism teaches us how to take control of our changes.
Know Yourself So You Can Transform
What does “know” mean?
I use to know in a larger sense of Accepting oneself fully.
This translates into three aspects of acceptance
To understand the “facts” of who you are
To anchor oneself in personal “faith” of your true inner nature
To be aware and use “perception” to guide how change flows in your life
Few people take the time to listen to their inner voice. Like it or not, as a culture we are at a place of crux, of change. That means as individuals we too are being forced to take a look at who we are. While many people will flow as the wave goes.
It’s also possible to be aware of your inner nature, to personally channel potential and flow change of oneself to heart, to your core nature.
Many people I know are taking advantage of this fact to drop out of the mainstream culture, to live better and healthier.
- If enough people do this: then this becomes the wave of potential that becomes a reality.
What matters is this, we are at a place now, to take advantage of the time to be in the heart. Heart represent connections to others and your life. Being in heart, in your nature and sure of oneself, is what makes the difference later for grounding and how one shifts their life to live well during times of change.
The destination is not the goal; it’s how we use the times to transform, to be oneself fully… That is the challenge and joy of being alive today. Possibly and I would argue these are indeed the best of times now… These only become the worse of times if you don’t live as yourself.
The destination becomes transformation, and the transformation is one of being your full potential in these times of greatest potential…
Also, know, in transformation you have many potential forms to take, many being good choices. It’s not the final form that matters, as much as making sure the process of transformation matches to your nature. Some people might be surprised at where they end up, but they will discover joy as the process followed their heart.
It’s a personal choice no matter how others may try to take your power away, take your choice of what you are to be away. Just by living and living well now, this is enough to discover and know yourself now. One step at a time in these times of potential.