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Today’s topic is a new teaching of Wound Language.

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As I live right now, ready to start another new life, I’m oddly stuck within inaction.

I’m holding back from throwing my star up and out to shine.

I… I’m a new day rising
I’m a brand new sky to hang the stars upon tonight
But I, I’m a little divided
Do I stay or run away and leave it all behind?

-Times Like These, Foo Fighters
I highly recommend this live SNL performance!

Julie Insight #1: You are the star. Heal remaining wounds and level up your shine!

The solution to my current feelings of inaction came the other day as we were helping a couple resolve problems in their relationship. In their love language, they were trying to become more, but past wounds were circling their language into conflict and threatening to break them apart. It made me realize that it’s all too easy to think you’re moving ahead when, instead, you’re holding yourself back with your wound language.

Hence the new teaching I developed this past month: Wound Languages.

What is a wound language?

• Wound Language is how past damage shapes our thoughts and therefore language to keep us in our wounds.

Casey Insight #1: Wound language reinforces a blame game of staying in the past. Avoid playing any blame game, which only keeps you in the past decaying; instead, focus on moving forward.

Over the last few years, I have noticed more than normal numbers of people working to heal past wounds through psilocybin and other techniques (Trauma Healing- Using Meditation). Considering the current political strife stirring up fear and problems, this makes sense. I’ve taught the dragons to face these times as a dance that alternates between pausing, being aware, and taking action (The Three Treasure process). The extra challenge is the fear we feel when we pause. This fear may stir up past wounds, distracting a person and derailing moments of awareness and growth.

Casey Insight #2: To live more gracefully we must include facing old wounds in our pause moments.

Casey Insight #3: Our wound language creeps into our day-to-day life, unconsciously circling us back into old trauma.

How should I throw my star up and out there to shine?

Well, in looking ahead, we often revisit our past, our mistakes, and most especially, our wounds. It’s difficult to throw a new star in the sky while also busy digging and rooting through the graves from your past. I was stuck in the mud of old wounds, unconsciously holding myself back to process some of my past despite my conscious actions of moving ahead. I will now finish making peace with these older wounds and then get back on to the road for my future.

If you’re feeling stuck right now, then here are two questions for you to consider.

• Are you holding onto an old wound?
• Are you communicating in a way that is reinforcing an old wound?

Emotional wounds don’t just happen in the past, they echo into our present, often without us realizing. They shape our language, our reactions, our relationships, and the way we see ourselves. To grow into our future, we need to recognize what’s still echoing and then shift the way we speak, both to ourselves and to others.

Last year’s comet :) Let’s not be a falling star, let’s be a rising star ahead!

Let’s Explore Wound Language

Common Emotional Wounds and How They Show Up

Many of these emotional injuries stem from early life experiences, but they continue to influence our adult relationships, self-worth, and worldview. Here are nine of the most common wounds, based on research in psychology, attachment theory, and trauma studies:

1. Abandonment & Loneliness

• Roots: Emotional or physical neglect, caregiver loss, divorce, inconsistent love.
• Adult Signs: Fear of being alone, anxious attachment, clinging or avoiding, mistrust of permanence.

2. Rejection

• Roots: Feeling unwanted, criticized, left out, or unworthy.
• Adult Signs: Deep shame, perfectionism, social anxiety, avoiding intimacy, feeling “not enough.”

3. Betrayal & Broken Trust

• Roots: Abuse, manipulation, broken promises.
• Adult Signs: Difficulty trusting, fear of vulnerability, hyper-vigilance, emotional distance.

4. Humiliation & Shame

• Roots: Public ridicule, excessive criticism, being made to feel worthless.
• Adult Signs: Low self-worth, fear of failure or exposure, people-pleasing, defensiveness, self-sabotage.

5. Injustice

• Roots: Harsh punishment, unfair treatment, lack of boundaries.
• Adult Signs: Anger, rigidity, sensitivity to control, distrust of authority, black-and-white thinking.

6. Emotional Neglect

• Roots: Caregivers ignoring emotional needs or being emotionally absent.
• Adult Signs: Feeling empty, difficulty expressing emotions, chronic loneliness, hyper-independence.

7. Loss of Safety & Security

• Roots: Chaotic, violent, or unstable environments.
• Adult Signs: Chronic anxiety, hyper-vigilance, fear of the unknown, need for control.

8. Inadequacy & Worthlessness

• Roots: Conditional love, constant comparison, unrealistic expectations.
• Adult Signs: Imposter syndrome, harsh inner critic, fear of success/failure, seeking validation.

9. Loss of Meaning & Purpose

• Roots: Existential crisis, unresolved trauma, disillusionment.
• Adult Signs: Apathy, depression, disconnection, lack of motivation or direction.

Step Into Healing: Change the Language You Live In

Recognizing our wounds is only the beginning. The next step is to change the language we use, because how we speak reflects how we see ourselves, and it shapes what we believe is possible.

Why Language Matters

Your words don’t just describe your world, they create it. If you continue to speak from your wounds, you risk staying stuck in the identity that trauma gave you. For example:

• Saying, “No one loves me,” keeps you separated in abandonment.
• Saying, “I always mess things up,” feeds shame and inadequacy.
• Saying, “I can’t trust anyone,” reinforces betrayal and fear.

Instead, healing language invites awareness, compassion, and growth.

Flipping Wound Language Into Growth

One of our teachings is Spiritual Jiu-jitsu. Flipping is spiritual Jiu-jitsu’s lesson number one. The concept of flipping is simple, you rephrase wound based language into growth based language. Now since love is to be more, what each person needs to be more is variable. So this process will help you learn more about the unique direction you need for healing from your wounds!

Flipping Examples:

• “No one ever stays for me.” → “I’ll be present for myself and enjoy time with those who choose to show up.” OR simply “I will stay for myself!”
• “I always ruin things.” → “I’ve made mistakes, and I’m growing and learning.” OR  “I will make things better”
• “I can’t show people who I really am.” → “It’s safe to be seen, little by little, at my pace.” OR “I see myself, I accept myself“
• “I’m just not good enough.” → “I’m worthy, even while healing.” OR “I’m great”
• “Nothing ever works out.” → “Problems are opportunities in moving forward.” OR “It will work out”

Please note that I gave two flip examples for each case. It is typically easier to create a smaller literal flip, but those flips tend to be harder to accept.

Closing Reflection: Speak the Future Into Being

Healing is not about erasing the past. Healing is a process of growing towards wholeness. Healing from our wounds is about speaking from a place the past no longer owns.

The words we use, with ourselves, with those we love, with the world are magical, they shift our perception of the world. They either keep us circling the same stories of pain, or they set us free to write better stories. Your language can either repeat your wounds, or it can reshape your reality.

You don’t have to wait until you feel further along in life to speak in healing ways. You become whole by choosing to speak your healing words now.

Julie Insight #2: Thinking Abracadabra (which means: “I create as I speak”) is your starting point when feeling stuck.

A Daily Healing Ritual

In the evening, look up to the stars and ask yourself:

“What part of me spoke the loudest today — wounds or wisdom?”

Then whisper a simple promise to yourself:

“I speak to grow, not diminish. I speak to shine and be free.”

Then throw your star into the brand new sky.

We each will shine.

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