The simple truth is that we need relationships. We’re wired to be in relationships. Being in a good relationship extends and expands our life. While being in a bad relationship shortens and hampers a person’s life.
The only problem is that it’s hard work being in a relationship. People change over time, our needs and stories shift as we age. As a result, if you are not proactive in working with change, your relationship will fracture and break over time.
People seem to think there are only two states of relationship. You’re either in it all the way, or you are out of it.
I remember when my ex-wife said that to me: Casey you are either 100% in or 100% out. The next day I realized with her thinking that way, I needed to be 100% out. There was no room to be in a state of transition with a partner who couldn’t accept nor work with me in my change. The point of this lesson: thinking of a relationship in such a black and white manner destroys many relationships and also dooms many people to stay in bad relationships.