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Midlife Spiritual Divorce

I was devastated when my husband told me out of the blue four years ago that he did not want to be married anymore. He had an irrepressible urge to be free and start a new life but was scared to act on it in case he regretted throwing everything away. We had always been so close, I could not comprehend what was happening. I scoured the internet for an explanation only to discover that he had all the symptoms of a mid-life crisis, even though he was only 35. It was terrifying to read about the anguish it caused, how it ripped couples apart and terrifying that there was absolutely nothing I could do; it was something he had to sort himself.

When, after two and a half years of indecision, he finally decided to leave and end our relationship, I was shattered. Every source I consulted emphasized the partner’s need for space to resolve their crisis but offered no advice as to how I could stand back and give them that space when I was so distressed myself. It was then that I stumbled on a Personal Tao and Casey’s rich teachings on midlife transition. He showed an understanding of the crisis that I could relate to. The idea of a spiritual divorce offered me a gleam of hope and I wrote to Casey asking for help. He showed me how to get through the pain by focusing on myself and my own growth. At first, I was grieving so much it was impossible for me to think of anything but the partner and marriage I had lost. But Casey was patient and gentle and his instructions simple and practical, and with his encouragement, I was gradually able to redirect my attention to my own life.

I came away from every skype session feeling brighter and more hopeful that life would get better. I had so many questions and Casey always had an answer. His tapes on what to do when your partner leaves and what to say when you talk to your partner proved invaluable: not only did they afford me an insight into the situation and offer me practical guidance I could follow, I could listen to them whenever I panicked and calm myself down. I learned that my husband needed to push me away in order to find himself. Knowing this, I was able to keep off the subject of our relationship when we spoke. With the pressure off, our talks became more lighthearted and pleasurable.

For the first eight months, my husband and I only spoke over the phone, mostly at his initiative, and then after a chance meeting, we arranged to meet now and then. After eighteen months apart, my husband feels by and large healed, and we are now getting back together, this time based on our needs instead of expectations. After such a deep crisis and long separation, it feels like a miracle. It was the hardest time of my life. I was so broken, following Casey’s advice was a leap of faith. But Casey’s insights have proved correct and his strategies have worked. Over the past eighteen months, I have learned to be patient and discovered the rewards of letting things unfold over time instead of forcing the situation; I have become less needy and emotionally more self-sufficient; I have explored new activities and rediscovered old interests. Casey has enabled me not only to get through the pain, but to come out on the other side feeling whole, more realistic and in a better position to start again.

I am deeply grateful to Casey for his great wisdom, and wonderfully kind and patient support and encouragement. The few sessions I have had with his wife Julie were similarly insightful and supportive. I feel extremely privileged to have had them both at my side throughout this journey and I sincerely hope that others facing the ordeal of mid-life crisis will not hesitate to call on them for their life-saving and life-changing guidance.

Working with Depression
Karen
Netherlands

Midlife Crisis Affair Help

When I look back over the months that I have been working with Casey, I realize that he has played many roles in my life. My teacher, my trusted friend, a father figure, and my mentor – minus all of the judgments, projections, fears, and expectations, that are so often unintentionally placed upon us by those who actually play these roles in our lives. Instead of living up to somebody else’s expectations and beliefs, Casey has taught me to lead. He has shown me how to turn down the background noise in my life, enabling me to make decisions that are true to myself and in keeping with my own values and beliefs. Casey gives you exactly what you need. The right amount of guidance, reassurance, understanding and gentleness. Along with the occasional push and jolt, wrapped in the kindest tough-love, there is. Ensuring that you continue to grow and move towards your goals, as you unravel life’s lessons together. There have been times over these past few months when I have felt particularly uncertain about the direction of specific things in my life. I felt unable to completely trust myself in making certain decisions, and I simply did not know how to ‘fix’ these things from where I stood. Yet despite this, I have felt the greatest sense of relief in knowing that I could instead put my trust in Casey’s experience and wealth of knowledge. And felt great reassurance in knowing that no matter what the outcome, someone very skilled and in tune with me, would always be in my corner.

Through Casey’s guidance, things have consistently changed for the better – just as he said they would, and in ways, I could really not have envisaged. These are the moments that have led to some of the biggest personal breakthroughs I have ever made. There are no words to convey, or any act great enough to express my thanks and gratitude in a way that is comparable to what his teachings and guidance have offered me. I have said before, that although I have met Casey during a very challenging time in my life, on some level I have found myself not wanting the tough times to end. Because if not for this combination, I would not be getting to know myself to this degree, nor would I be able to say goodbye to many of the unhealthy fears and limiting beliefs that I have held onto for decades. I may never have acquired the awareness to go on and recognize my full potential in various aspects of life, or to stand on the peak of a very high mountain from where I could see happiness, trust, and love from again. If you are ready for change, my advice is to work on yourself through Casey. To ‘grow, expand and explore’, as he teaches me. Thank you, Casey – my friend, teacher, and everything else in between.

Midlife Crisis Affair Help
Diana
Australia

In a 75 year study of happiness from Harvard shows that it comes down to our relationships as being the most important factor in a person’s happiness in life.  A Personal Tao includes learning how to explore our relationships to help improve the flow of your life. Let us help you strengthen your relationships. We have been helping people solve relationship problems for 15 years.  These relationship articles will give you a new perspective on how to grow, repair and improve your relationships.

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